Can’t Handle it...having a moment😣

I can’t handle it when someone leaves me.
It’s the worst kind of pain and it is still hurting.
I bet they knew that when the decision was made.
Ours lives continue on anyway.
Except I don’t know how to get past this.
It’s so stupid.
It’s why I continue to ask, why do I exist?
Then someone says gives their opinion.
Why are you  so dramatic? Are you doing this for attention?
No but I wish that they could understand that.
It so hard dealing with these facts.
I’m not toxic. it’s just my voice never really gets heard.
Struggling to find the words.
People who I care for leaving, think that I wanted that?
I am still by the way feeling a lot like crap.
Now though, I don’t know if anyone could help.
The dumbass opinions don’t but what’s left?
Jisatsu ka? (Suicide?)
Kore de owari da! (This is the end!)
No,I can’t think that way. No way at all.
If I were to end things , it be a long fall.
First comes darkness then a lake of fire.
That’s my fate if I don’t aim a little higher.
I do apologize in advance if this is dark in the dumps.
Still going through a slump.
I believe people are keeping their distance for a reason.
I don’t mean to darken the season.
I don’t mean to give off this negative energy.
I just write things down base off what I see.
A toxic man and his sad writings.
The worse thing a person could do.
Leave that person alone and make them feel that everyday too.